Note: I wrote this journal entry/prayer only three days before I ended up getting "sick" and not being able to function. The Lord had been preparing me for the battle ahead. I'm so grateful for that.
Excerpt from journal
Sunday, June 1st, 2014
Buffalo Ridge Retreat Center
The unfolding of your words gives light; it imparts understanding to the simple. -Psalm 119:130
I rise before dawn and cry for help; I hope in your words. My eyes are awake before the watches of the night, that I may medidate on your promise. -Psalm 119:147, 148
Let my cry come before you, O LORD; give me understanding according to your word! -Psalm 119:169
Lord, I commit this summer to You. Have Your way. Have Your way with me, in my life. May I continue to walk in the conviction of Your sacrifice, of the work that You completed for me on the cross. May I continue to experience the freedom of not having to accomplish things. No matter how stressful it gets at work. No matter how I may feel. Don't let me lose this powerful revelation. Instead, please keep speaking this truth over me.
I love Your truth, Your words. They are life to me. For too long I tried to live my life in Your name by my own efforts. But I give in. I choose to be comforted by Your truth. I choose to stop trying to feel good about myself, about my accomplishments. I choose to find my identity in You, not in what my hands can do or make or hold. I'm giving all of myself for all of You. What an unfair exchange. But what a beautiful exchange!