more thoughts on Surrender

When I went on a personal prayer and planning retreat at the beginning of this year, I felt like the Lord had given me the word “Surrender” for 2021 as a focus. As I’d been reflecting upon John Mark Comer’s The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry, I realized that a huge part of my surrender needed to be finally becoming intentional in observing a weekly Sabbath. This has been a huge learning process for me as I’ve continued fine-tuning what I want that to look like in my life. It’s been hard for me to find the delicate balance of rest, devotion, and delight (three essential elements in my Sabbath practice). I’ve learned to sometimes say no to good things and to also make exceptions to my own Sabbath guidelines.

Recently I realized that I had reached a point of physical and spiritual exhaustion and possibly even burnt out. I’m grateful that the Lord provided an opportunity for me to leave my daily routine here by going to Orange County, California for almost a week. This break was a breath of fresh air for my spirit and helped me discern some of what the Lord has been calling me to in this season – surrendering by saying no to good things in a couple more areas of my life. I reluctantly stepped down from being one of my church’s volunteer youth group leaders – I no longer had the capacity to do this well even though it’s still a huge desire of mine to be involved with the next generation of Jesus followers. I’ve also “pressed pause” in another important area of my life, trusting that He is in control even without my constant striving. Although I’ve always believed that He is sovereign and good, my human nature often desires to take control and to “make things happen.”  

As this year quickly approaches its end, may you create the space needed to reflect upon what He has been teaching you and begin asking what He has for you in the coming year. 

mid-year reflection 2021

Every July I remind myself that though the year is half over, there are still six months left that have not yet been lived. After my personal prayer and planning retreat in January, I felt the Lord leading me to focus on “surrender” this year. Probably the biggest way I hoped to surrender was through beginning to intentionally observe a weekly 24-hour Sabbath. I decided to do so Friday evening through Saturday evening and told my parents in order to be held accountable. I realized that I would need to have a lot of grace for myself in this process – it would be a radical change to my lifestyle of overworking and packing my schedule with commitments. This is why I made it clear that I was just TRYING to incorporate Sabbath into my life. I knew there would be some failed attempts and some exceptions made.

As a “recovering perfectionist,” I must remember to aim for progress, not perfection. I’ve definitely made a lot of progress in trusting Him that six days is enough for work, but I admit that some weeks I mostly zone out on my Sabbath. Rest is only part of my intent with the Sabbath; I also desire to delight in Him and spend intentional time in prayer. 

I’m glad that I take this time to evaluate and reflect upon the first six months of the year – it helps me refocus and to determine the adjustments that I’d like to make in order to finish the year well.

I hope that this encourages you to reflect upon your own year and ask Him to help you finish the year well. Please remember to accept the grace that He has for you in the process.

healthy limits

I’ve been feeling a bit overwhelmed this past month and especially this week with everything going on around me in politics, with the pandemic, and with the extreme polarization even within the Church. I’ve learned, the hard way, the importance of setting boundaries of my media consumption, including my social media consumption. That doesn’t always mean to completely eliminate consuming all media. I know that I’ve been blessed to participate in some prayer services through online means. But scrolling through the extreme and often hateful commentary on IG or FB doesn’t benefit me in any way. 

I have to be intentional in how I spend my time during this season. My Father is the One who renews my strength, through my time speaking with Him, in Worship, and in His Word. So while I wait for the presidential election results, I can choose to avoid anxiety and fear by focusing on His truth and character. He is faithful and will give me the strength and grace to make it through whatever comes next, just like He always has. And I’m so grateful for that.

some new resources for 2020

Toward the end of last year, I developed some habits that I was excited to incorporate and bring into the new year. I wanted to share them in case you might find any of them helpful in your own life. :)

1) Daily Audio Bible: I've read through the entire Bible at least twice thus far, but I've recently struggled to get back into a Bible reading plan. At some point last fall I came across the Daily Audio Bible podcast by Brian Hardin. Brian has been recording his daily Bible reading for over 14 years. After reading several passages (Old Testament, New Testament, Psalms & Proverbs), Brian expands upon the context and challenges us to apply it to our lives. This is followed by about 10 minutes of prayer (listeners call in with their prayer requests, encouragement, & comments). I love feeling connected with the body of Christ around the world by praying with them and for them. There is also a DAB app available that has the podcast in many languages and with the option journal and to read along with the recordings. I'm so excited to re-incorporate the Bible into my daily routine!

2) Hello Mornings by Kat Lee: This book introduced how to start my morning with a simple three minute routine: God. Plan. Move. I've incorporated the God element by beginning each day by praying a simple verse: "May the morning bring me word of Your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in You. Show me the way that I should go, for to You I entrust my life." (Psalm 143:8). This has helped me begin my days with a surrendered heart, focused on God. It's simple enough that I can do it on a regular basis. I've incorporated the Move (or health) element into my mornings by drinking a large glass of lemon water before I do or eat anything else. I hope to eventually add more to each of these areas, but I like that I've started with something simple & easy to incorporate into a daily routine.